"We like camping better!" --Raymond Alexander Kukkee

view of the north shore Critter Pond, KOA Canandaigua NY [c] 2009 jcb

Please don't hate me, but I simply must share this camping tip with you

From the file marked "things that make you say hmmm..."

north shore KOA Canandaigua 2009Over the preceding months I've tried to offer you some helpful camping tips, along with other related articles, pictures and stories. In addition, down the page a ways in the sidebar, I've linked to a number of blogs of similar theme. I've found these blogs and lots of great article ideas by subscribing to a Google Alert for "camping tips."

Every day I get a nifty email from Google listing all sorts of interesting postings from around the world that are somehow related to camping tips. Sometimes the relation is tenuous at best, with the words "camping" and "tips" separated by other words that veer off into unrelated topics. These alerts are always informative and often entertaining.

Some days one or two of the offered snippets leaves me scratching my head. Today was one of those days. Rather than scratch my head some more and risk further hair loss, I've decided (just this one time) to share the puzzling text with you. Perhaps you, better than me, can fathom its meaning.

Here's the snippet included in today's camping tips alert (all links omitted):

Go camping predominantly. The pre-eminent mode to grasp the bodily is to spread out not numerous days camping together. And what can be more affectionate then sitting together approach tense close axe and watching the flames?

I sincerely detect a wonderful tip for romantic camping here. It's in there somewhere. Granted, it's only a snippet of the original posting, so other contextual clues might be missing. I do love grasping bodily and watching the flames. However, the whole "tense close axe" concept has me concerned.

Okay, maybe I'm being mean. I realize that the Internet is indeed a "world wide" web. For some, our befuddling language presents translation challenges. Still, this camping tip hints at well-intended and thoughtful insight. If I could understand the author's intent, I'd be happy to link to the original post.

Ideas, anyone?

Posted by Jim, who really isn't a mean person.

Can you help me translate the quoted camping tip? Your Comments always welcome.


  1. It is a good idea to translate this fine quotation...The right translation might mean the difference between returning to that magical spot with the same camping partner next year or not.

    Let's translate this as an international camping project turned Canadian, since the watching of beavers and the hewing of firewood should always be included in any noble camping effort. It is also inherently clever to keep that axe otherwise involved, isn't it?

    How about " go camping predominantly" as in,
    "to be camping in the wilds mainly for the purpose of enjoying nature, instead of going camping with the idea of drinking beer, watching television, playing cards and rowdy carousing whilst listening to a 48" boom box playing full blast?

    Naturally the pre-eminent mode of camping is obvious, for all participants in tents and RV's to spread out across the landscape, rather than staying all crammed together into a tiny campground trying to emulate a noisy little city in the bush?

    Of course that could also be translated as

    " the best and most beneficial way of camping is to spread this exciting time out like peanut butter, and camp only for a couple of days on each trip having an enjoyable time instead of packing it all into three, count them, Three --continuous weeks of total boredom, rain, mosquitoes and hiding from hungry bears poking around the campsite looking for baloney sandwiches.

    "The pre-eminent mode to grasp the bodily" is a real stumper, it might mean grasping the true essence of camping, but we can stick with the funnier, only other truely international interpretation if we so choose.

    Although grasping nature bodily and staring into the flames does sound interesting and romantic too, one can only do that for a few days at a time without the social atmosphere getting tense in the tent....the spouse might even want you to go off fishing or chopping more firewood or tossing beaver sticks into still waters instead. .....who knows? The solution might be to see "Camping Trips: How to avoid clashes with your spouse and Children" ":)

  2. Outstanding reply, Raymond!

    I do believe you've divined the depths of this mystical quotation. Ain't camping grand?